Tag Archives: words

Buffering

How often do we get annoyed waiting for a download? As technology has advanced, we’ve gotten spoiled and increasingly more impatient with the few seconds this transformation occurs, forgetting that this process used to take minutes. (Not to mention our personal history with “dial-up” connections…we need not remind ourselves how old this makes us sound!)

. . . ___. . . Buffering . . . ___ . . .

Yep, we even have a fancy term for waiting on technology: buffering – -waiting with purpose and a heightened expectation of data coming our way. We’re paused as we  wait for data or images to load, so we can proceed with our next electronic interaction. The momentary lapse in electronic connection makes us feel restless.buffering symbol

Software programs have even designed creative ways to give us digital holding cues…a flashing line promising that progress is about to happen or a bright green line racing around a circle offering the illusion of “almost there.”

Last week when I was feeling the pressure of navigating a tight schedule while trying to accommodate the various speeds on which my children operate, it occurred to me how often I act as a buffering agent to those around me.
Like the mysterious data preloading that occurs, our buffering efforts go largely unseen but are constantly at work.
As moms, we’re often filling in the gaps between one family member to the next. We are frequently redirecting children, softening sharp edges of voice tones and harsh facial expressions. We’re constantly monitoring the goings-on in our families, serving as a hub in which each family member dives in for a brief connection then returns to their homework or computer screen.
We help modulate the buzz of activity in our households, buffering between family and houseguests or redirecting young sibling traffic to a neutral zone when teens are hanging out in another.

Even our pets use us as buffers. During yesterday’s thunderstorm, my golden retriever would not leave my side as she panted and anxiously tucked her tail, looking at me imploringly to “STOP MOVING ALREADY!” so she could settle.Katie hiding from storms

As women, we probably have more buffering systems in play than men, so it’s not unusual for me to hear stories about how a friend is  intervening between her husband and their realtor; or navigating details between her husband and service workers (and hoping to get the details about the roof leak, the hot water gadget, or the pool pump control panel interpreted correctly).

. . . ___ . . . We buffer between extremes. 

We lessen the impact of potential harsh consequences we see coming, but they may not. 

. . . ___ . . . We referee between siblings. 

We reframe feedback from challenging teachers and revved-up coaches  in ways our children can absorb it more constructively.

All this buffering can take a toll on us, leaving us feeling battered and weary. Sometimes on a day when we’ve spent so much energy putting out other people’s fires and not gotten our own agenda accomplished, we’re left feeling unproductive with an empty tank.
This past Sunday when I was feeling off-kilter after a busy week of solo parenting, I managed to stop for a few moments and go offline.offline mom break

Even though I’ve been trying to practice the art of Sabbath rest, the struggle to downshift is tricky. During waking hours my brain does not seem to have an “off” switch, so this striving to rest is a discipline I have to work at intentionally.

As I’ve recognized the draining pull of this nearly constant buffering, I’m beginning to appreciate the nuances more and realize the hidden impact my unseen efforts have on those around me. Slowly, I’m giving myself permission to power down” so I can truly recharge and be more effective as a nurturing buffer rather than an automatic boomerang.
Like it or not, mommas, this buffering stuff is part of the gig. I’m grateful God wired us to multi-task and self-regulate so we can stay on track when needed. I’m also thankful for the grace He extends to us and through us, so we can upload a positive influence on our families.leaves fallen

Fall is our friendly buffer between the lingering mugginess of Summer and the harsh chill of Winter.

As we transition into muted days with a crispness in the air, may we slip away for some nature walks to rebuild our inner buffering system. We’ve got this, friends!

What is YOUR recharge going to be this season?

“We must cease striving and trust God to provide what He thinks is best and in whatever time He chooses to make it available. But this kind of trusting doesn’t come naturally. It’s a spiritual crisis of the will in which we must choose to exercise faith.” – Charles Swindoll


 

Landing zones & Launch pads

In the fast shuffle of summer activities and quick transitions from one camp to the next, our landing zones tend to attract odd bits and pieces of our lives, gaining depth and dimension at warp speed.  messy desk

Graduation announcements from last month mingle with lingering Christmas cards, awaiting that elusive moment of “getting around to it” for mailing a congrats card or transferring a friend’s address from the cute family photocard into our phone contact list. Our good intentions taunt us from these leaning stacks of paper and unprocessed mail each time we pass by on our way out the door.

That workbench out in the garage for “projects?” Yep, it gets piled high with everything from replacement toilet seats and seed packets of spring flowers that didn’t get planted to athletic shoes that have to be returned because feet have grown too big for them. One season of detritus gloms on to the next and soon you have a mishmash of holiday decor and unrelated sports gear teasing you as you park your car each evening.garage workbench

These landing zones of our lives naively begin as “planned” triage centers (assess urgency, prioritize level of importance and divert onward) but sneakily become perpetual messes that overwhelm us, nudging us toward stagnation rather than action.

As moms, we often become the landing zone for our family members, too. We gather stories from our kids about their latest interactions with friends, reactions to something Coach said at practice, or quirky things that happened at youth group. We get inundated by requests for new shoes, spending money for lunch with friends, or last-minute items needed for a camp that starts tomorrow.cubbies

Requests, logistics, multiple schedules, deadlines, menu planning, and household responsibilities land on us repetitively throughout the day. Demands of family life pile up on us, little by little, until we feel bogged down.

Inertia starts to feel familiar and perhaps even a little cozy. It might be easy to succumb to frustration and exhaustion because we constantly feel like the target zone for problem-solving and distribution central.

Another way to view the chaotic landing zone in our home is to see that it also serves as a launch pad. From this dumping ground of nitty-gritty details of busy family life also springs the data resources to point our crew in the right direction. The schedules, sports agendas, camp registrations, invitations, announcements, and endless stream of college brochures are landmarks for our kids’ journey through childhood. WE are their navigators. 

As we absorb the impact of our children bouncing off of us as they hurl themselves into a variety of childhood experiences, we can empower them to launch from us in a healthy way. If we are able to provide some rallying encouragement and emotional steadiness while they are refueling in our safety zone, they will gain confidence in their own trajectory.cloud art

Sometimes it isn’t easy being the staging ground for these multi-faceted, difficult-but-necessary tasks to be completed before an impending countdown. Although you feel the pressure tangibly building for launch and feel a little clumsy with all the delicate maneuvers, the outcome can be intensely rewarding for each successful takeoff.

So, hold steady, my friend. Reinforce those buffering systems. Let that striving child take flight in his own way. Breathe. Pray. Repeat. While awaiting his sweet return, clear your landing zone and prepare yourself for the next liftoff phase. Provide that foundation of a strong legacy of faith. Solidify his base now so as he launches farther and more independently, he is clear and focused on his ultimate flight plan. Remain steadfast in this training period so you’re both ready to launch well.

Legacy page of Bible Quilt
Legacy page in my #BibleQuit

 



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The Story Teller

Tell Them Their Story 

 

   We all love a good story. It doesn’t matter your age. It’s even better if there are hidden gems of laughter, harrowing moments and happy endings. We just love getting lost in the detailed threads that tug at our hearts.

 

Our children love to hear “their stories”. They ask to hear them over and over. We laugh and gasp at all the same parts every time. And I realize that we add chapters to their stories with each day, each vacation, each experience, family event, tradition, hug and “I love you”. It’s in every ordinary and extraordinary day that we have.

The stories help cement it into each of our minds  when we re-tell them; it’s something  for all us.  

Pictures and albums help with that too. The time spent in conversation is a layer of warmth for the soul that is something extra special. Face-to-face conversation is becoming less and less in our society; everyone wants the short and condensed version of events.  But when you give some time to sharing, you will hear: 

“Read it again, please!” and “Can you tell it again?” and then it turns into, “Remember, Mom and Dad, when I did this,  and when that happened?”…  It’s such a rich layer to a person. 

When you have  many children, this helps in giving that individual their unique identity. In a group setting,  you can easily speak each child’s love language by reminiscing of a fond time together.  It’s so easy to add this layer to your home, but it is becoming lost in our digital agendas. Fill your child up with words that champion them; show their hearts how spectacular they are. Hand them their legacy as your family shares past generations stories too. All of these conversations  combined are a treasure, not bought. The value is priceless for our hearts. 

 

I thank my God in all my remembrance of you.   -Philippians 1:3

 

Snuggle-in, hug them, laugh with them, and reminisce—again and again.

ONE letter matters

When I was in 6th grade, I competed in the district spelling bee and lost because I added one  letter to a word. My 6th-grade son recently competed in his school’s spelling bee and missed a word by forgetting one letter.spelling bee word list

One letter matters.

In the world of spelling, one letter means the difference of staying “in” the competition or being “out.”

For enthusiastic writers who are vulnerably casting out their manuscripts only to be met with a flood of rejection letters, ONE letter of acceptance matters. One letter shifts the novice writer from being an amateur to being “in” as a published author. This inclusion is savored.

encouragement cardsFor the widow that spends many hours and even days alone, receiving a single handwritten note makes a meaningful difference. One letter can change her perspective from feeling lonely to loved. She feels remembered.

When a spouse is deployed overseas and is feeling the weight of isolation and homesickness, one letter from a loved one back home draws him a little closer to family. A familiar scrawl or silly doodle on the envelope tugs those hearts together a little tighter. He feels connected.

In a world of digital pictures and casual greetings available through Facebook and texts, even one handwritten letter delivered by snail mail on your birthday can transform all those virtual well wishes into a tangible token of love. There’s something special about holding a letter in your own hand that was in your friend’s hand just a few days ago. One letter can ground you, reminding you of a precious friendship. You feel known.

So last week when I was fighting a head cold and clutching my kleenex box, I hunkered down and wrote some letters:

  • to my son traveling on an exchange trip to China, hiding one in his suitcase under a box of Thin Mints and giving another letter to a friend to deliver to him midway through their trip (the potential embarrassment, I think, is worth a little sneakiness!)
  • to a Chinese couple whom I may never meet, but I’m entrusting the care of my 16-year-old son to them for 3 weeks while they generously host him in their home (sigh)
  • to a nephew, apologizing for belated birthday wishes
  • to an aunt undergoing radiation and chemotherapy, offering hope and encouragement while also recognizing her strengthBaylor pillows
  • a “thank you” to a loved one who sewed some pillows for me that I’ve been “planning” for years. Confession: I cheated on this one. I took a picture of the pillows tucked into their new nook and a sent her a text of gratitude. (Go Bears!)
  • to a college friend, wishing her the joys of another birthday

Throughout the week as I wrote to each person, I focused on the recipient. I considered their particular situation, reflecting on the connection between us and conjuring up some words to send their way. Before long, I was no longer aware of my stuffy head and my pesky cough. My mood improved as I redirected my attention to a loved one or reminisced about a dear friend.

Aligning letters on paper to transform them into a message to someone else is a magical thing, something we often taken for granted.vocab

Words are used a lot of different ways in our home. We are seekers of knowlLatin conjugationsedge and explorers of the written word. Our bookshelves are weighed down with words.

The boys are always working on a vocabulary list or conjugating verbs in a language I don’t understand.

Words surround us.

Letters weave in and out of our home daily, an endless merry-go-round of giving and receiving. Some of them we glance over; some of them stop us in our tracks. One letter can shift the atmosphere around us, crackling with anticipation or casting a somber chill.

Which letter do you cling to most?
Bible - I Cor 13
The letter that I’m drawn back to again and again is the Word of God. Each time I read it, I gain a new perspective and gain a deeper understanding of something bigger than me. It stirs my soul.
I’m grateful for this ultimate gift. The holy Word is God’s letter to us.
It’s full of wisdom and adventure, heartbreak and triumph, joy and strength, loss and redemption, strife and struggle…but most of all,  its message is love. It offers us hope.

——->>>>>  THIS one letter makes all the difference to me

Phlox

“Every word of God is flawless.” Proverbs 30:5a

 

 

 

Love is in the Air

 

love  Thank You, Lord, for the Sounds of Love.

There are so many we appreciate and are thankful for. Our ears are receiving them daily. When you pause and make   a list of your personal love notes, the sounds become even richer.

Here are a few of mine…

Prayers out of my children’s mouths. 

Praise songs on the radio.

Gentle guidance in my husbands voice.

Birds singing.

My boys’ giggles over pure silliness.

Picking up the phone to hear a loved one’s voice on the other end.

The family dinner bell.

A chat with a friend over coffee.

“Please, thank you” and an endless surplus of “I love you” from my children.

 

painted-birdsAll of these are God’s Love Notes to  us throughout our day.  Look for Sounds of  Love; they are a melody written for you and me. These sounds are all a reflection of Christ’s love. Each day we contribute to the sound. Is it a sweet or aggravated noise?

 

I can Love Loud: by being a cheerleader or advocate for someone. My words can build-up a self-esteem.  I can use my mouth to pour out encouragement. I can share Christ’s Love by demonstrating actions that result in life-changing Love.

I can Love Silent: from a distance, with unfailing stamina my voice can quietly lift up prayer for someone going through a painful trial. I can be watchful as I use Love Notes of Hope to form a prayer. I can rejoice quietly when I watch the Lord conquer the plan meant for harm.

I can Love Deep and Wide: by emotionally investing, pursuing and pouring out for a loved one. With a no-going-back mindset  I can plant Love Notes that I water and fertilize by using words of hope, peace, love.

I can Love Sideways: by partnering with someone that needs an arms-length approach. A peripheral friend to scatter a Love Note when needed for someone to get their bearings on a situation.

And sometimes Love Just Happens: in an unexpected moment, I can see a need and” rise to the call”.  Acting in a moments notice without much thought or preparation I can add encouragement  with a Love Note because I have been tuned into listening to the Lord’s  Love Notes over me.

Because Your steadfast love is better than life, my lips will praise You. Psalm 63:3

you-are-so-loved

Sharing my Bible Quilt™

Sometimes we stumble into a way of doing something that is meaningful to us and think it’s just “our way” of doing something. God may have bigger plans for our little “simple” shortcuts. He may want us to share them with others and let Him grow it bigger. This happened to me last year with my Bible Quilt™ journaling.
Trust full pageNot long after I began this quiet time project, I had a friend struggling in a relationship. I grabbed my Bible Quilt™ and immediately turned to my section on Trust. I sent her a picture of a couple verses that seemed applicable to her situation. Although we were long-distance, within a few minutes she had something in my own handwriting. Since I had spent time already reflecting on these verses, steeping in them myself, I felt like I had been able to share with her more deeply than typing the verse into a text or email. Somehow this process personalized the support, highlighting God’s Word as the Spirit had led me in my devotions.

Sharing God’s Truth through the handwriting of a friend is personal and powerful.


As I continued to share with friends, I realized how this simple tool had become a way to minister to others, offering them something personal and grounded in the Word during a time of need.

Sometimes we don’t know what to say to a friend who is hurting. Offering a gentle reminder of God’s truth in your own handwriting is a simple gesture of love.

Bible Quilt - MekaBible Quilt - MekaDuring the holidays, I shared my Bible Quilt™with a few friends and family. We all agreed that we had a mishmash of verses floating around in a variety of places, so having them all together in a Bible Quilt™ journal seemed to renew our efforts to gather them in a meaningful way.

My simple technique seemed to strike a chord with others. The more I shared, the more collaborative the experiences became. I learned that left-handers might choose to put their tabs on the left side of their journals and may orient their book pocket a different way.

I heard some insightful ways some ladies were going to use their Bible Quilts™ during their quiet time. I’ve enjoyed helping compile kits that can be given as gifts. I had the fun of introducing an older generation to the joys of washi tape.😃

washi tape

Duct taping Bible Quilt coversWe had a family session during Christmas break. What started out as craft time together quickly became more of a weaving of connections. Mothers and daughters worked side by side, sharing laughter as they fumbled a bit with duct taping their Bible Quilt™ covers.

Mother-daughter Bible QuiltingA young daughter’s face brightened when she realized she would have her own designated page in her mom’s Bible Quilt.™

Favorite verses were swapped as a variety of handwriting styles emerged from different generations.

We experimented with phone apps and online Bible searches yet also cracked open a Bible concordance to show the kiddos how to find a verse that we mostly knew, but wanted to have worded correctly in our journals. Sharing verses

Siblings put their heads together to harvest verses for a page on Kindness

In a crafty environment with washi tape and markers scattered all around us, we connected in God’s Word and learned a little bit more about each other.

The beauty of this project is that it’s just a beginning. We now have a common ground for sharing. We’ve agreed to text verses to one another to help fill pages according to each individual’s themes they have picked as categories to focus on during this season. A certain teenager may have issued a challenge for us each to have our journals full by next Christmas and be ready to share them. That puts a little fire into our motivation to keep this going!

Persevere pageThe more I share this simple journaling technique, the more I’m humbled by God using us in unique ways for His purpose.

Psalm 107:1He allows us to connect with each other in Him through the use of ordinary supplies in a creative way…gathering together and weaving His Word into our lives in our own style, sharing personal stories along the way. God is indeed in the midst of our ordinary moments, unifying us for eternity.



If you need some motivation to get started, Bible Quilt™ journal kits are now available at Ordinary Threads.

Amy kit in display crate
Amy kit in display crate

Join us in the Facebook group “Ordinary Threads” to share in the conversation as we exchange ideas about our individual progress in our Bible Quilts.™