One of the many joys we have both learned as Boy Moms, is to embrace the sheer pleasure of destruction in our sons’ worlds. I truly believe that a few of our kids only humor us with our Christmas tradition of Gingerbread-making because they know the day will come at the end of the Holiday Break when we will bring them all together again for: Demolition Day!
Yes, we are “those moms” that give our sons Nerf guns and hammers and on the count of 3… let them wreak havoc on our cookie creation. The whole thing is usually reduced to rubble in seconds while the two of us try to capture the fleeting moment for a scrapbook, dodging bits of gingerbread and candy flying past us!
This is how we look at it: children are constantly told to “be still, be quiet, don’t touch this or that, stop running…” It must be so difficult to contain all that frenetic energy bundled up in these growing bodies, AND obey all the adults that want them to stop acting rambunctious! Of course we can’t have children completely run amok (!!) but there should be some balance in their behavior training.
There are times we can create appropriate moments to run, yell, jump, wrestle, and touch everything in sight. So that’s what this day is about for our Gingerbread Warriors. They anticipate this day greatly, and we all dive in to the fun of it. So when we say “be still,” they can, because they trust us to tell them when it is time to “run with abandon!”
Enjoy the “play”; these moments are treasures tucked into your children’s hearts. They will become more important to you than all those moments they were quiet.
“Open my heart, Lord, to the gifts of this day!”
Dinner is over. Boys are in the kitchen
messing around doing dishes. Dad and I sneak out calmly walk out of the kitchen and down the hall. The boys’ voices escalate to fever pitch blend in cheerful unison to their blaring peppy playlist. We look at each other knowingly: it’s time.
We kick off our shoes and I toss off my hoodie.
Taking a deep breath, we rip open two bags of large marshmallows and load up. Armed with handfuls of sugary fluffballs, we are ready…
pad in our socks stealthily approach the boys unaware and we begin to bombard them with marshmallows. Shrieking erupts as boys duck behind counters and hide behind each other.
We fire off as many marshmallows as we can before they have time to retrieve them and return a barrage at us. Soon they are pelting each other with marshmallows, then ganging up on us. Giggles break out between shrieks of delight and whispers of strategy.
I get a brief reprieve as I corral our golden retriever to put her outside; she’s enthusiastically smacking her lips from the mouthful of marshmallows she’s already snagged.
White blobs blur by my head and soft splats echo as marshmallows find their wriggling targets.
Alliances form and my husband guards my back as I gather up more soft ammo, now sticky from all those sweaty hands. We emerge back-to-back and throw jet-puffed balls at whatever moving targets we can see. The tide turns quickly as our
conniving loving offspring smush the marshmallows into large balls and throw at us rapid-fire.
breathing heavily gazing at each other with laughter…and my husband eventually calls a truce the finale when he sees that more marshmallows are sticking to cabinets than bouncing off the floors.
arsenal reloading clean-up, the boys swap stories and exclaim excitedly as they find marshmallows in curious places.
cheap inexpensive family fun that allows parents to act silly crazy wild like kids and to bring a little outdoor experience inside when winter days are stretching long.
Marshmallow tag is a win-win!!
ambush surprise your kiddos with some spontaneous fun. If you’re feeling especially naughty brave, go for the jumbo-sized marshmallows snowballs!
People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.
A neighbor that our family holds dear in our hearts just said goodbye to a mother of 90 years. Such a good, long life, but still hard to lose at any age, always.
she loved her children dearly
she worked hard in life
she poured into her family
she stood up for us, and stood by us in every circumstance
she knew how to make each person feel important; special
I never met this woman, but I listened to this son’s heartfelt sentiments and I began to think…
Feelings trump Actions a lot of the time. The memory bank cements the details with the years added; but the feelings infused to the spirit stay long and hard in our minds. Our heartstrings are attached to those feelings.
This is good news to the daily grind of life!! But a strong, powerful and important lesson to pay attention to…
whatever the event, circumstance or situation, be it good, beautiful or ugly; you can CHOOSE to end each well. There is an enemy that would really like to keep this a secret, but oh what a great Godly weapon against such one!!!
Listen: God can restore anything when we choose to give to to Him. Every time that we show LOVE, KINDNESS, GENTLENESS, SELF-CONTROL... we are ending it well. The people around you- Family, Friends, Strangers, God-orchestrated People will remember how they felt in your presence long after any event or meeting.
I know that I strive to point to the Lord with my life. I want to look like a big, beautiful, messed-up, imperfect, redeemed, restored person that ended things well because the Lord showed me how. And then that irritating enemy can’t replay any tapes to confuse me later, because God stops him, and reminds me how we ended even the hardest things in life well; together.
Embrace every moment you’re given. Time flies and moments are fleeting, but as you give the very best of you, then our Lord can use that to be part of your legacy.
—Mercy Me has a song called “In the Blink of an Eye”—
Here are parts of our Legacy:
This shamrock plant is in my house and my sister-in-law’s because it reminds us of our mother-in-law who loved this plant. We both have quilts that go back to great-grandparents in our lives that we wrap our children in. We share stories about loved ones that have gone on before us, and we cook with the recipes of cherished women in our past. All of these simple things implant feelings on our hearts; they are an evolving legacy…
Each transition that we take hold of will add another layer of texture to our lives and our children’s memories of home.
But the steadfast love of the Lord is from everlasting to everlasting on those who fear Him, and His righteousness to children’s children. Psalm 103:17
“This is the day that the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it!” Psalm 118:24
I love traditions. I get sentimental about ones passed down from generation to generation. Like family recipes, photo albums, or holiday gatherings. There is something exciting about creating your own, too. We began making gingerbread houses each year with cousins when our two families united. It began with the adults doing the baking and decorating and the babies watching or sleeping, and then shifted over the years to our boys picking elaborate themes and much candy eating and laughter!!
As I add the layer of traditions into our home, I feel it’s important to take some of mine and a few of my husband’s and mix them together. Christmas morning is really yummy at our house because we make his mom’s coffee cake and my mom’s blueberry muffins; they both are on the table because that brings back our childhood. But I think it’s important to thread the next layer by starting some traditions with your children as well. You will be initiated into our winter family tradition of an Indoor Snowball Fight (marshmallow pelting) if you come over in December! And expect to see a basket of crazy Christmas socks by the door for all who enter; they are great for sliding in! We might occasionally eat holiday cookies for breakfast during this month too and giggle in our pajamas… This weaving of multiple threads of tradition really creates a beautiful layer in a home.
A cherished friend places a grandmother’s oil painting of a winter scene out each December to remember her.
My boys love it when we take a silly moment in our day!
Hot cocoa breaks and bedtime snacks are favorites with us.
Share stories of family events, look at photo albums, curl up with hot cocoa or cider and read, play in the snow, laugh out loud together, bake something yummy and indulge this season in traditions.
–When you have two households of boys, your gingerbread morphs into Superheroes sometimes!
Sometimes you don’t know when a simple craft activity is going to have a big impact. You’re just trying to keep those little people in your house engaged in something productive so they aren’t tearing the house apart!
Several years ago I led my boys through one of those Make-a-Plate kit projects and then actually managed to get it mailed. Some days the simple completion of a task is a major accomplishment, right, busy Mommas?” Since we were working on table manners and talking about how the kids could show kindness at school, I chose the Fruits of the Spirit verse and let them pick which concept they wanted to illustrate. Rainbows, trees, and stick figures emerged as those wriggling bodies slowed down to color and carefully write out these powerful words.
“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and
self-control.” Galatians 5:22
We were all excited to receive the package of our completed plates! Each week we would choose one Fruit of the Spirit to be our focus. We set that plate on a stand as a colorful reminder as we passed by it throughout the day. At dinnertime we enjoyed hearing about the gestures the boys made with friends, teachers, and soccer teammates to show that particular character trait. As parents, we shared examples from our workdays or stories from our childhood. Sometimes we used the plates as ice breakers for teaching moments as we redirected boyish antics at the table. When setting the table, we often shared knowing looks with each other as we placed a certain plate in front of a specific person, acknowledging “he sure needs a little extra self-control tonight” or “she needs some PEACE today.”
When we signed up to go on a mission trip with our church and were asked to share a family devotion, we took our plates on the road — literally traveling 2,000 miles roundtrip to visit a children’s home in Mexico. We used the plates to illustrate our story of trying to put the Fruits of the Spirit into action in our daily family life. We helped lead the craft activity for those children to make their own plates. Many kids chose the phrase “Dios es Amor” = “God is love.”
Although we weren’t present when the Children’s Home received their shipment of plates, we heard it was a time of great JOY as these children received something tangible with their names and drawings featured. The following year our family returned to the same Children’s Home and we saw how much these plates were being used and treasured by children who had little of their own.
When we returned home from the mission trip, we made a poster to share at our local school and had another chance to share the Fruits of the Spirit in the context of a mission trip report. Several of the students were unfamiliar with the verse, but it became “real” to them when they passed the plates around during show-and-tell.
I was humbled as I realized how God had created an outreach of ministry from one small family project. Our family’s craft activity was shared with our church’s mission team families, about 100 Mexican children separated from their own families and then again locally with children at our sons’ classes at school. God is faithful. He reveals His GOODNESS to us through our small actions that He uses in big ways for His glory.